She is just after his money not love!


gold-digger

So it’s a little controversial topic but actually happening more often than you think where the women is just into the guy based on how much money they have and not that she is interested in finding love.

So, if a woman loves you for who you are, she’ll want to spend time with you whether you’re footing the bill or not. If she can list off every meal you’ve bought her and everything you’ve purchased for the last month, but doesn’t give a damn when you invite her to a homey get-together with the fam, you may have a gold digger on your hands.

Here are the tell tell signs up front!

1.She never pays for dinner

So the first dinner I agree should be on the man this is the tradition and men get your pennies out on the first date. However if you see she never offers to take you for dinner or pay this is a clear signal that she is after your money. For some reason the dinner scenario is a very good example and test to see if she just enjoys being taken out or if she is willing to pay her way.

2. She loves going shopping but happily takes the gifts

She is always happy for you to pay for gifts even if you offer, she never says no, she just stands back and takes takes takes each time without putting her hand into her pocket. I would take this as a warning sign.

3. Children are old enough but she has made no attempt to work

The kids are old enough and spend most of their time at school and she has still made no attempt to find a part time job or bring in any money. She may have lost her confidence and is scared to work but she should get back to work once the kids are old enough to go to school.  Personally I think that you should want to get back to work or earn some money so help contribute to the family even if it’s working from home based jobs.

4. She gets in a temper if you don’t get her what she wants

She starts to get upset and angry with you if you don’t get her what she wants as far as gifts go or posh enough dinners when she is not contributing to it at all. Beggars cannot be choosers!

5. You just have that feeling ..

You just think that she likes you because of money – better to face it sooner than later before she leaves you once you have no money left?? Confront her and see how that goes if she is not after money she won’t get that upset.

6. She is willing to put up with anything for the money

She seems like the ideal woman, happy to clean, cook and be domesticated so you look past the fact that she is only doing it for money! Being unequal can cause issues so really think about this before you become involved.

Get the courage to see through the gold digger!

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Why Are People Afraid to Commit to each other?


commitment

Firstly sorry its been so long since I have posted I have been on a long holiday from blogging in the hope that I will be fully refreshed and ready with some new content!

I really wanted to address my friends who are single but not because they cannot get a partner but because they are afraid to commit to take a chance and to make the leap out of singlehood.

Philosopher Jiddu Krishnamurti says that love has no room for obligation. “When there is love, the word ‘duty’ disappears. It is the man with no love in his heart who talks of rights and duties, and in this country duties and rights have taken the place of love. Regulations have become more important than the warmth of affection.”

Why are you afraid to commit to another person?

1.They fell out of love and it’s not their cup of tea anymore!

Have you ever heard a friend say this to you before? Perhaps they got burnt once being in love and they are actually very afraid of falling in love and becoming a victim of being heart broken again without even knowing it consciously. Quite often these kind of people become quite bitter but secretly they want to fall in love or be in love. Inevitably there is always collateral damage, intensified around that word commitment: “You said you loved me. You promised to stay.” There’s a bad guy and a good guy. Heartbreaker and heartbroken. Rarely is the split mutual, and even then, it’s bumpy as hell.

2. People who have been together a long time have to ride the good and bad times

Quite often I hear my friends say that they have fallen in and out of love a million times in the same relationship so this is evidence that you have to try and ride the relationship waves to be able to commit and have faith that things will get better.

3. Giving up is easy to do in the 21st century these days

So it feels like some women are quite happy to turn to the grass is greener side once things get a bit boring. I know a couple that were together for 6 years and married in a civil church. They were young and never considered that a real marriage. After the six years they decided to tell their parents they wanted to marry in a church and two years after they forked out 20k for a wedding. The guy was bored and on Tinder searching for the girl that matched him now. I am not judging that person as people can change but suddenly after committing he got very scared and suddenly fell in love with a girl he met on Tinder!???

4. They care what their mates think of the girl / boy

Perhaps you have met someone who is not that model you expected to settle down with then she just aint good enough! He/ she cares way too much about what their friends think about the normal girl next door.

5. People are less interesting in marriage

People are less interested in committing and marriage. It’s all changed, I see more people having babies before or without marriage these days. Have things changed? What do you think?

6. Someone who never wants change

My friend has been with her boyfriend for ten years and she desperately wants changes to happen in the relationship but nothing ever changes. He won’t commit to getting married, having kids or even living together but she has not attempted to try and make any changes. She and her good nature are being used. He is the perfect example of someone who is afraid of commitment

“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.”

XOX DD

 

 

 

We don’t have chemistry…


Chemistry has a purpose. It’s not random; it’s not a fluke. There’s essential information in the attraction that occurs between two people.

It’s important for us to know what chemistry is so we can use it to feel more love in our lives. Without understanding that there’s a secret order to love, we feel out of control. And no one likes that.

Don’t worry, you’re not out of control. You’re just in love. And there’s a reason you feel a strong chemical attraction towards the people you do. That’s what I’m going to discuss today.

I often hear people talk about chemistry as if it’s a bad thing. Like we should be wary of the people we’re attracted to the most. And I understand why this is a common warning: Because these people tend to bring our issues to the surface.

It’s true that strong attraction makes for a wild ride in love. But the question is: Is this really a bad thing?

Some people will say yes. Sure, if you want life to be easy then the path of strong attraction isn’t for you (Side note: Is there an easy path? I’m still trying to figure that one out). Of course, we all want love to be uncomplicated. But we are complicated! So why would our relationships be anything less?

From a spiritual perspective, love is supposed to be a wild ride. This doesn’t mean that we stick around in relationships that are abusive or feel horrible to be in. But it does mean we recognize that love will provoke us to grow into fuller versions of ourselves. And this isn’t easy!

Feelings such as of insecurity, doubt, fear, jealousy, judgement, and contempt (all ego feelings) will appear with the people we desire most. Because of this, many of us categorize these highly attractive relationships as “bad” or “unhealthy.” Spiritually speaking, however, these relationships are doing what they’re supposed to do — they’re provoking your ego to surface so you can transform it.

When we remember that relationships are meant to teach us growth, we approach the “bad” very differently. We know that there is a lesson in every challenge — that lesson is to regain a connection to love.

Lessons of love take on many different forms. Sometimes reconnecting with love means leaving the relationship. Sometimes reconnecting with love means sticking around and working through the challenges. Sometimes the lesson is learning to forgive your partner. Sometimes the lesson is learning to forgive yourself.

Yes, we all want peace in relationships; they’re supposed to be blissful and loving. And when they aren’t, we know we’ve fallen off the path of love and we have to get back on track. This is how we grow.

Don’t bypass or downplay the chemistry you feel; remember that it exists for a reason. The people you’re most attracted to are your greatest teachers in love. Show up for the lessons they have for you.

How to mend a broken relationship? Is it possible? but how..?


DD Advice…

I think you are very naive if you think that you can live a life free of arguments and broken relationships, this is what builds you and makes you the person you are today. You are not alone if you are finding that you keep meeting the wrong type of people, the good news is that you are not alone and the last piece of good news is that you will be ok.

Relationship facts

  • Everyone has ups and downs within a relationship there will always be disagreements and perhaps even a disconnect
  • There is probably always periods where one person is a little more into it than the other – one that is doing less for the other person and then balance periods
  • You won’t find a perfect match you will always miss things within a person
  • Its a very important part of your life and impacts how you feel emotions and feelings daily
  •  Some differences are important within a relationship as well as being different – its really important to have a balance
  • If its good you know it and if you need to leave it you know that too – have the guts to just know it and follow through

Key Issues in relationships / people getting into them ..

  • You become desperate for the relationship that you don’t consider the person well enough
  • You are not a good match – you clash – you are too different or too similar ( too extravert / opposite)
  • You cannot communicate one person is never keen to talk to the other person and tell them how they feel
  • You settled for the person who you thought would do, not the best person for you
  • You basically did everything in the wrong order, you got the kid and then got married – trust me you need time being married before having a child – otherwise it will backfire
  • You never wanted the relationship enough or had to fight for the love
  • You are attracted to other people at the same time – This person is not enough
  • You want different things from life and the future

How can you fix it?

  1. Deep down you can fix anything if you work hard enough and if you really want to work for it, dependant on many other factors.. time, love, and issues
  2. Couples coaching is well worth doing, its amazing what a third party impartial person can do to help
  3. Have more space – get a hobby or take your mind of the issues – focus on you / this is important
  4. Every day think of something good you can do everyday / have a happy thought
  5. Be positive can bring a person closer
  6. Dont get drunk when you are in this emotional state ..

How to plan a wedding in two weeks!


So its fantastic to be getting married and maybe shocking to most girls but not having to plan in a year is a dream come true! Wedding planning believe it or not brings out the monster and crazy person in most women, if you want to avoid this then follow a few steps and have the perfect quick wedding.

Find a unique venue that won’t take long to book 

  • Look into hiring a restaurant somewhere in a good location that people can get to and that will do most things for you
  • Why not have a winter wedding the prices come down and most things become free – you can have the honeymoon in the sunshine

Make the invitations 

  • Send out virtual invitations first to confirm the date – after you confirm the venue
  • After why not hand make the invitations that way you do it quickly and they are more personal
  • Suggest you go to paperchase and get some handmade ideas – get stamps and post them
  • Make sure you collate everyones address first!

invites_favours_new

Pick a theme 

favours

Get a good priced dress – its a sample place but the service and dresses are AMAZING! 

  • http://fairytalelondon.com/ – This is based in london and there is a real range for all women so try it!
  • Be careful of using any online sites as they are scams most of them I would stick to going into a shop and trying the dress on trust me!
  • If not why not get a plain on and dress it up with accessories

dress

Entertainment 

  • Why not get live music its going to make the night perfect – Jazz band would be fab
  • How about hiring a magician – look up Alex Ward he is fab!
  • To top it off a balloon artist!
  • Make your own photobox experience – get cameras and props ! Polaroid cameras

jazz

Getting hitched – How does it work in the UK!

  • Register your marriage – you have to call up your local registry office and register – all you need to do is book the appointment two weeks before the actual wedding and the interview takes a few minutes
  • You book the registry – google Mayfair library weddings for example
  • You can get married in two weeks and the cost of the room is low – do it!
  • You can hire live music for the actual marriage

registry

https://www.gov.uk/marriages-civil-partnerships/overview

Check list 

  1. Get family and friends to help with the wedding – assign tasks out and invite everyone to get involved
  2. The dress – wait for my next article that tells you what dress suits what body!
  3. Make the invites
  4. Favours can be something small and personal – Tesco have a great site at good prices
  5. Get a friend to take photos – save money and natural photos are much better on the day
  6. Get live music
  7. Why not have a sit down dinner and an evening party just for drinks
  8. Hire a vintage bus – http://thelondonbuscompany.co.uk/
  9. Decorate a vintage bus for guests

bus

 

Decorate the inside of the vintage wedding bus

 

busdec

Five reasons why men stop wanting sex


1) They are in a mood with you 

  • Holding back with the intimacy can occur because they are in a mood with you clearly this is a good reason
  • The argument has turned them off you!
  • Flirt with him and try to make it up to him but don’t push for it sure that things will cool down

2) They want to break up! 

  • They want to break-up and they are holding it back so you get the message that they are not interested, so you break-up with them! Men hate having to do the deed they always try to get the female to do it first
  • Confront the situation in a calm manner and don’t panic

3) He is stressed out 

  • Life is too stressful so he just is not in the mood – try to talk and do relaxing things together

4) He is freaked out about commitment 

  • He is really freaked out  so back off and relax – don’t pressure him!

5) He is worried about his performance 

  • Tell him you have noticed things have changed – tell him how you like it and work on it together – getting this correct will take time!

Watch out for any bogus excuses!

 

Being tempted after you have fallen in love & falling out of the love zone


It’s a funny place to be in once you are in love and then that starts to ware off day by day, the branches start to grow in different directions, and you feel strange or that you are with someone who is no longer comparable. I hear people say that after a year and a half of being together or two years the love wares off slowly, and that is when you either survive or die ( relationship and heart that is ) … For us we are still madly in love and its been a year and eight months.. anyway back to the story!

Signs of the love changing into weeds

  • You start to look at other guys and girls and lust after them manly you want attention from others, not your partner that lust and love is no longer the same
  • You find the stability and familiarity too boring you are looking for new excitement
  • You feel like a different person, perhaps you have new friends and you are looking to explore new jobs and things
  • You don’t want to be so intimate with the person anymore – sex feels strange and awkward
  • You find other people more fun to hang out with – more than the old partner
  • Perhaps you feel you are very different now and you have grown ap
  • You start to lie to each other more
  • Want to go out to nightclubs and parties

How can you keep your relationship fresh 

  • Try to focus on why you loved the person and think of what life would be like without that person
  • what would it be like not to have that relationship and person – put things into perspective
  • Do you see a future together and why ?? there has to be a good reason
  • Ask friends and family for an honest opinion
  • Spend time with your partner being open to trying something new
  • Avoid a situation you can cheat – AVOID when you are having these thoughts!
  • Keep it fresh and go away on a holiday or weekend break together
  • Have time to think if you think it will help to miss them