Signs that show you’re in a committed relationship


love-issues

The Daily Mail  newspaper says..

Planning a holiday, driving each others’ cars and having a key to your partner’s flat are all signs a relationship has got serious, a new survey reveals.

Researchers quizzed 2,000 people to reveal the top 50 things which indicate a couple are past the ‘seeing each other’ phase.

Posting a ‘loved-up’ photo on Facebook, changing your status to ‘in a relationship’ and being introduced to wider friendships circles also show couples are the ‘real deal.’

It’s also proven that the girls are happy to go out without makeup on and dressing up is also no longer such a big deal as you have started to feel more comfortable and relaxed. The guy has started to like you as a whole and is less focused on your physical appearance. However not to say you should let yourself go now but you should be more relaxed.

Around the six month to one year mark you should be talking about moving in together so that you get to know each other properly. Some people say bound on religious purposes that they only want to move in together once they are married. Well this is a serious risk as you really only know someone once you get married to start off with.

Meeting your partner’s parents and friends is also important as you become more serious with each other and becoming the other person’s plus one on invites and christmas events and cards.

The study also shows two in 10 people knew their current relationship was serious after they planned a holiday together, while 43 per cent said the words ‘I love you’ and the same percentage discussed moving in together.

Indeed two-thirds of people polled and in a relationship claimed they felt their first holiday together was a real milestone and demonstrated how committed they were to each other.

Someone I know said his mortgage means more than a marriage and kids he is well committed now that they have a house together. I would say that this is not very romantic but that is how some people see commitment these days. What do you think?

Another wise friend said to me commitment is when you put your partner before yourself and yourself after your partner then you know you are committed.

It’s obvious that commitment means something different to each couple and individual, it is very important that you have the correct level of commitment in your relationship that you feel happy with. For example if you have a mis-matched level of commitment in a relationship then this will cause big issues. If one person wants marriage and kids and the other person does not want it then this is a major mis-match.

Watch out girls after nagging a guy for ages they suddenly say they have changed their mind about something like marriage or kids I would be dubious, believe it when you see it. Many men just drag things out to keep you quiet or happy! Don’t be a victim that it becomes too late and you can no longer have the things you want. Or you are too old to move on!

Love DD XOX

Advertisements

Changes in a relationship – break-up’s and staying together


Relationships definitely have ups and downs and at times we believe we can never make the other person happy or ever be good enough. It’s like a decision tree at this point and your relationship can take a turn in many different directions. You have to really be honest with yourself and each other to get through this difficult period and to unwind any unresolved issues.
Why did this happen?
If you feel your relationship is heading in a different direction and things are not like they use to be then there is a reason for this. Perhaps your partner has stopped giving you attention perhaps they started to put their job first. Something that happened over time and you are even in denial over this. You may start to look back at the relationship and compare how it was in the past. If you have been together for a while perhaps with time you both changed as person.
What are the impacts?
Ok, partners could start to look around at other people to try and get attention, this makes you feel more confident and loved. You decide to avoid the person and you may become snappy everything they say annoys you it’s like a buzzing Nat in your ear. You could start to slowly divorce yourself of the relationship and even compare your partner with a past relationship. You feel like things have changed so much you start to feel emotional, insecure and unhappy.
What should you do?
You need to be honest with yourself about how you are feeling before deciding anything. You should judge the relationship over its lifetime and not just in parts, your partner deserves to be reviewed with the good bits and bad bits. You should try to imagine life without them and to think about how this would impact you both. Communication and time are the best cures in this situation in my personal opinion. Being honest with your partner can save the relationship. Take time away together and spend quality time together before rushing to a conclusion.
Is it too late?
I’m a strong believer in the fact that the grass is not always greener, everyone has good points and bad points. Also everything does happen for a reason when it’s the end it’s happened because two people ended it really. As they say if the fights worth fighting then make sure you fight well as finding love is one of the greatest things and most valuable things in life.
Breaking up …
Staying together …
 
Both take time and hard work but I know my readers are smart so be strong and I wish you all the best xx

How to let go and move on to find someone new


It’s difficult to understand why men like certain women and why they have no interest in others.
It’s difficult to understand the rules of attraction clearly and it’s one of those areas we will never really understand fully. One thing is for sure and that I’m certain about is that no matter how you look or are there is a possible match for you out there in the big wide world.

I am a strong believer is everything happening for a good reason even if we don’t realise this for a long time.
Being lonely is very difficult it’s a feeling that can absorb you and for some it takes over their life and character.
My advice to try and find someone is simple. Try these few steps and let me know how it goes.

1) Feel good about the past, let go of anything bad you hold on to from past relationships. Cleanse your soul and heart of any bad feelings, revenge or guilt from the past. Why is this important? It’s important as you cannot find love properly if you are living in the past and the likelihood of meeting the correct person is lower.

2) After cleansing your soul and heart of the past you need a review period – here you need to review where the relationship went wrong and why it failed. Why is this important? Because you need to understand how to not get into the same situation again and rather than hate the ex you can learn from him/her. For this to work you need to really evaluate where you went wrong to start with.

3) Enjoy meeting new people slowly – don’t rush into meeting someone, this is a rebound and the likelihood that it won’t work is high. Use this time to feel good about yourself – being alone for the first 1-6 months is healthy.

4) Once you meet someone ensure you like them for the correct reasons and not because you are lonely. Become friends and get the happy balance of being happy on your own and the openness to meet someone new.

5) Getting into a relationship again – make sure that you meet on a regular basis but not too often at first or it’s all about the lustfulness.

6) Become happy and satisfied with what you have – understanding that everyone has a good side and bad side!

17 online dates Date Two! POF Plenty of FIsh.com


Thanks to my friend who tried 17 online dating sites and 17 dates! She did not want to be named!

So it’s becoming much easier to meet new people now I have tried on-line dating for the second time. We start to go through the same route; message a little, then send some text messages and we meet ( it’s all becoming more normal)

Second site and its Plenty Of Fish .. This site looks cheap like its been knocked up in the garage by some kid on a weekend. However its easy to use and more importantly its FREE! I think that this was the first free site that started up and it became much bigger than expected.

First Impressions of POF

  • It’s easy to use and user-friendly but looks cheap and I think it attracts stranger people than Match
  • Its seems less sophisticated than Match.com and really has an edge of desperation
  • However I managed to get a date so lets see what happens next

The Date

I managed to get a date with a surgeon who told me he liked cake, when we met up he seemed nice he had a flashy car and was good on paper so far… so good… Immediately after talking for a while I found out he was moving to Manchester soon so why did he want to date me in London. Anyway we had a drink and there was no spark! I hate to say it but so far the Match.com date was better even though he was not my ideal man! This site seemed to attract a different class of male yet was Free! This was not for me TW – Time wasters

Next!

Why is love so hard…


Why is love so hard? 

  1. Labels terrify some people and uncertainty terrifies others
  2. We see people getting screwed over so often
  3. Some people are so, unbelievably shallow
  4. Quitting is easier than fixing
  5. Because falling in love isn’t hard at all. It’s the getting back up after your heart has been smashed into a million tiny pieces that’s so brutal

1) Labels ensure that they put pressure on men and women beyond belief and this quite often results in relationships ending. How can we avoid this? Well I think that its good from the start to be honest and open about what you want and expect from the relationship. Don’t try to change a person or live in hope for them to change for your benefit then get upset once it won’t work. Ensure that you communicate honestly and ask the other person what they want from the future too!

2) We see people getting screwed over so often and perhaps this haunts us into thinking everyone is the same way, it’s not good to use your past or others to tarnish a new relationship. Make a fresh start and don’t look backwards. This will give you the best chance of survival

3) You need to get past looks, look looks and find someone who is nice inside and outside. I think that you need to try to get to know someone as a friend and they will grown better looking naturally. People change in looks and can change so look past this or you will end up on your own!

4) Quitting is easier than fixing something that is harder work.. I do think that every relationship and even marriages need help at some point. You have to be a good judge of character though and really consider all of the key factors! Some friends hate men and will find all of the negative things but you need to talk it through with your partner before giving up or going on ..

5) Try and forgive a person and to move on even if they have heart you. Remember that humans are only human and we cannot help but mess up at times

XOXO DD hope it helps

Are women doing things the less traditional way these days?!


Welcome back from DD! Sorry I have neglected my blog for a little while, we were busy planning our wedding then got busy getting married and then went on honeymoon! Anyway enough about me, in summary I missed my blog and readers!

I noticed many of my friends are having babies first before getting married and other friends are marrying same-sex, things have really changed and I wanted to know what you all think of it!?

  • There is a good reason why things should go in a specific order marriage, kids and so on… It’s important for a couple to bond together and at every stage to become prepared for each stage and having some time to enjoy married life together before having kids will prepare you both for kids and let’s be honest life changes once the little ones come
  • Many women pressure men into getting married through having children first and not sure they would admit this out loud – Would he marry you without the baby ?
  • Loads of people use money as an excuse not to get married – but you can do it on the cheap even get to a beach and get married
  • Finding someone to love you is hard and loving them back in the same way is harder, you need to give it time and don’t force things
  • Don’t panic and find any man and marry him, please do some digging and research before heading down that road, for example if my ex’s girlfriend knew his past she would not go to near him! Be safe and not sorry!
  • Don’t rush as you think you are running out of time – things will happen for you just have faith in yourself
  • To find love does not come easily so hold out for the correct person and don’t become desperate

Good luck

Five reasons why men stop wanting sex


1) They are in a mood with you 

  • Holding back with the intimacy can occur because they are in a mood with you clearly this is a good reason
  • The argument has turned them off you!
  • Flirt with him and try to make it up to him but don’t push for it sure that things will cool down

2) They want to break up! 

  • They want to break-up and they are holding it back so you get the message that they are not interested, so you break-up with them! Men hate having to do the deed they always try to get the female to do it first
  • Confront the situation in a calm manner and don’t panic

3) He is stressed out 

  • Life is too stressful so he just is not in the mood – try to talk and do relaxing things together

4) He is freaked out about commitment 

  • He is really freaked out  so back off and relax – don’t pressure him!

5) He is worried about his performance 

  • Tell him you have noticed things have changed – tell him how you like it and work on it together – getting this correct will take time!

Watch out for any bogus excuses!